You've got me down on my knees and I proclaim, "All hail the heartbreaker."

A few things to get out of my head. Sorry.

Fucking Anish. I want to just walk right up to him and punch him square in the mouth. Even though its been over a week since we've broken up and like two days since i learned about all these fucking-me-over secrets, i am still fucking furiously fuming. And somehow, he is still trying to make these things my fault! That right, turn all your shit around on someone else cause that makes YOU the better person, right? Ugh. First of all, how the FUCK are you going to yell at me for working fucking two jobs and being tired after a 16 hour workday for being tired? are you SERIOUS? you fucking sat in a classroom all damn day with your pencil shoved up your ass, then went to have sushi for lunch with your fucking man date. Then drive home (oh shit- must be rough) and sit on the fucking couch. Oh but you have to get up early? Stop fucking complaining to me, i don't honestly want to hear your whiny ass. So does everyone else in the fucking world. Pick up your shit and move the fuck on.

So, after fucking three weeks of him fighting with me every single day, he tells me that he feels like "we are growing apart". WTF???? I ficking have been working 16 hours a day! Yeah i barely have tme to shower let alone sit around with you while you takl about the people that you work that that honestly, i dont give a shit about. So he tells me this AFTER i say a million times that all i wanted to do was go to a fucking bar with him. So, now, lemme get this straight, Your going to bitch at me all fucking week and make me pissed off every single night at 1am that i don't spend enough time with you and that i don't care about you, then go fucking get upset when i wanna go out WITH YOU? Alright, somethings wrong here. So, he tells me that hes going to go to white plains with his co workers. Mind fuck #1. The Fuck? Since when are you guys best fucking friends? Hes playing tricks on my mind testing where i will go, stay up here and go out or go with him. Fuck that shit, im staying here! Im not driving to white plains to get blasted, then drive back, especially with him. He cant fucking drive.

So he ends it with me. I fucking leave, and to a barrage of phone calls from him. Get the FUCK out of here. I told you one more fucking time you break up with me, thats it. Enough. Im fucking done. He doesnt get it. Tries to make ME look bad!! Are you serious? What the fuck have i done to you? Its alwasy been what you want 0 never what i want. EVER. How are you goin to pull that shit with me? Do you think im retarded? Consistently calls me restricted- like im going to fucking pick up. Seriously. Then he will text me a KAZILLION times about how he is losing his phone in a few days, and he has a new number but he doesn't think its best for me to have it, he loves me and is sick, in the hospital cause he fell down the starirs. Dont fucking call me AT WORK to tell me that your in the hospital. Then, not even fucking tell me why and make me look like an asshole for asking you a million times in front of my boss. blah blah blah. Mind Fuck #2. This morning, he tells me hes moving, he applied for it already. Hmmmm, where? 200 bucks says its fucking Jersey cause thats where Ashley The Slut is from. Then he tells me that its for the best considering how much i hate him. Honestly, what is wrong with you? You should be fucking kissing my feet for the shit i have put up with with you, in the past few days, let alone a year and a half.

Im just so sick of being lied to by him. How is he gonna tell me "watch the people im hanging out with and trusting cause they are going to fuck you over like they do to everyone else and are untrustworthy"? or that they have alternative motives? What the fuck motives do they have? Who have they fucked over? You dont count, since you lied to them your whole fucking friendship and isolated yourself. sooo..... BULLSHIT. Your making more shit up and guilt tripping me into getting back together with you which, let me put clearly, ISN'T GOING TO FUCKING HAPPEN. Done.

I also NEED my fucking car back. I dont understand why its so hard for my mother to just lend me the goddamn money and i can pay her back cause i cant get a loan. Do they honestly want to drive me anywhere? I feel bad going with mike and dean constantly... I need my car!! And im so close, i need like 500 bucks more. Maybe if you fucking helped me pay for some other shit like heath bills or tax bills which ahem YOU fucked me over for, then i would have the money. GRrrr.

Ugh. If i keep going ill be here all day. Ill save the rest in my head until i feel like im going to punch someone in the jaw again, then put it here instead.